Competition

I play tennis occasionally with friends.  Doubles.  We’re not quite ready for Wimbledon yet, but we’re getting better.  I noticed at one point in the game my partner was anxious.  “If we lose this point” she told me “we’ve lost the game”.  I laughed, and told her OK, whatever.  I’m here to have fun.  She laughed.  She relaxed.  We won.

America loves a winner and, don’t get me wrong, it feels really, really good to win.  Competition is good.  It focuses our attention and makes us play better.  But if we allow competition to drive us, or worse yet drive our children, we have taken away far too much of the joy of any game.

I want my kids to be the best they can be at anything they put their hands to.  But, more than that, I want them to take pride and pleasure in their own growth, enjoying every moment of the game, feeling their bodies move and their hearts pound and feeling themselves as whole human beings, body, mind, and spirit.  If they win, that’s great too.  Next week we won’t remember who won which game of tennis.  We’re there for the fun of it.